i think about you all the time. i wonder if you miss me, if you think of me as well. i wonder if you think of reaching out; telling me that you wish things were different. i wish you would come back to me. it’s lonely without you.

holding my breath has started to suffocate me. i can feel myself getting blue in the face, waiting on you to make me exhale. my lungs constrict, chest tightens, and my body begs me to let go.

“it’s over”, my brain pleads , the edges of my memory burning itself away.

“not yet,” my heart cries, “there’s still a chance. just a second more…” seconds turn to minutes, to hours, to days, weeks, months. my heart is stubborn. i haven’t the breath to disagree with her anymore.

my brain knows better. “they’ve moved on.”

my brain hopes for the best, but not for me. she hopes the new one treats you well; hopes they’re everything we couldn’t be for you.

still i sit on bated breath, should you ever want to come back. there’s still a home in my heart for you. there is no key, no code to enter. you know your way back and you know your way in.

i’ll always be here, ready to exhale for you.